the present is a gift, and i just wanna BE

i have no clue what to blog about today. so i'm just going to spill out some random thoughts and whatever comes to mind in this loose entry. beware.

so if you don't know where the title of this blog is from, and you probably don't, it's from "Be" by Common. i've been listening to this boy a hell lot recently. his lyricism is just inconceivably godlike -- funny, witty, deep, conscious, playful, intelligent.

i have a stupid taste in music.

have you noticed that i like to ridicule myself? poke fun at myself? put myself on lower terms compared to everybody? be a dick to myself? well, it's not becuase i hate myself. not because i hate myself with the burning passion of a million suns. but it's because i treasure the gift of humility. i treasure it so much. you get so much out of being humble. i may be going out on a limb here, but humility = perfection. seriously. put others first. sounds ridiculous. but it's rewarding.

hm, i've lost a bit of commitment. i've lost a bit of dedication. maybe not a bit, but a lot. good thing it's almost over. i'll just give as much effort as i can for the last bit. i'll regain the mental strength after this is over with, and pick up from where i am going to leave off. do you not know what i'm talking about? i'll leave it up to your imagination.

Saturday, November 15. the beauty that is the 2009 Hyundai Sonata possibly pulls up into our driveway. magically. by itself.

i have a bowling tournament on the same day as well. bowling is gay. bowling is fucking gay. sometimes you try so hard and there's still so much possibility of error. sometimes you try your fucking hardest and your outcome is full of failure, and sometimes you feel like giving up. have you ever had times in your life like that? i know i have. it sucks.

regardless, bowling is fun, and the active bowling community of Southern Ontario is awesome.

so yeah, a lot of you know that i like rap music. and that i really would like to try rapping. so here goes (LOL):

on the mic i'm dirty
i won't stop when i'm thirty
studs betta watch out cuz with girls i'm flirty
i box beats with a right hook
i stare you down with a tight look and i got you more than just slight shook
writin' shit down on a blogspot
white boy try to hang with the blacks and they say "wag-- whatttt?"
these raps are gettin too outta control, gotta focus
but i'm too eager to spit raps that swarm you like a locust

let me tell you a story about a turnin' point in my life
when i almost lost it and put the skin to my knife
i mean knife to my skin
my mistakes should be forgiven
so i went through a time of depression
when the devils were to scared to confess in
front of my face, what they truly thought
i couldn't put up with this unruly flock
they replaced their confessions wit' hate words
slashin' my feelings wit' they million swords
i was torn apart on the inside
it was a hell of a ride
would you excuse me if i'd
tell you that my thoughts are bonafide

uhhhhhhh lol. nice try kev.

so here i am, it's 12:44, and blogspot is keeping me sleep-deprived. kinda stupid since i had no homework today. i hope you like the new layout. i am random with colours.

goodnight.